the secret

The secret to a life beyond mediocrity begins with correct spelling...

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Boo Yah!

Me is 160lbs as of today! Eat it nerdz! 10lbs in 2 months. I'll take it!

Monday, October 25, 2010

A Letter to Slow Drivers in Fast Cars

Dear Idiot in a Fast Car Going Way Too Slow,
I am writing to let you know that I live 20 minutes from all civilization. When I finally come to Old Spanish Trail, I want to go at least the speed limit to get home quick. I have already been driving for 10 minutes and still have another 20. Old Spanish Trail is a one lane, twisty road that I can not easily pass you on. Why are you driving a yellow Ferrari and going 35mph??
I just wanted to let you know that you frustrate and confuse me. I also hate you.

Sincerely,

Lindsey--the girl who just wants to go home

Friday, October 22, 2010

Gluten + Tummy= Gut Irritant

Greetings!

Let me start off by saying that gluten is bad for you. You should not be eating anything that contains aforementioned gut irritant. "What?!" I hear you call wildly into the night. "But 'everyone' recommends hearty whole wheat bread for a healthy diet," you say. Sorry to tell you this: 'everyone' is wrong. Gluten is not just something you cut out if you want to lose weight, but if you want to stay away from many diseases and health issues as well. Fo realz! I never realized how our daily lives are so in-freaking-credibly affected by what we put into our mouths.

I shall now tell you a little tale about me and my rendezvous with pumpernickel bread. Oh, sweet, sweet pumpernickel. It came crashing into my life a few weeks ago via my mother who "needed to get it out of the house." All that was within me cried, "No! Away with thee Satan!" Yet, I took it back to the solitude of my house where I could be alone with said bread. Before the bread could look sideways, I had eaten two slices lavished with butter. It tasted so good, yet I knew that regret was just around the corner.

Fast forward 20 minutes to me laying on the bed with a nauseous gleam on my face and a twisted up tummy. 6 weeks of no gluten and then suddenly loads of it=bad. Like, bad bad. The same thing happened to me this last weekend as I decided to partake in 3 chicken strips. Not as bad as my affair with the pumpernickel, but it still had the same, "blluugghhh" effect.

I tell you that, to tell you this: www.paleodiet.com, www.marksdailyapple.com, www.robbwolf.com Read. Join their Forum and ask questions. Everyone is well informed and nice.

"Witty quote about researching information for yourselves."--Mark Twain

Disclaimer: Creationists, calm down. Focus on the diet and its benefits, not the evolution part.

And now! More fat Lindsey pictures! It has been 7 weeks since the start of "The Journey to Minimize Self-Loathing". Scale isn't moving much and, as a side note, I'd like to take a chain saw to its ass.

September 3



October 20th


September 3


October 20th


Why hello Waist! I haven't seen you in a while! Welcome back to being part of my body! Once Love Handles leaves town, I am sure Waist and I will be getting together with New Jeans.

So, my fat pictures lead me to my next aspiration; running a 1/2 marathon. My attractively athletic husband ran the Mount Lemmon Marathon last week. It inspired me. Surely if he could run up an entire mountain, I could run a half marathon going mostly downhill. Right? Well, we will find out. It is on my Life To Do List; may as well get it over with now. You know, besides the fact that it is something that I want to do.

P to the 'eace' to the out!





Saturday, October 9, 2010

Slowly the Fat Fades

Adam is a dweeb. I am sorry you all had to endure the previous post. Though well written and hilarious, did not make me want to get off my butt and exercise any more than I normally do. But! There is something that does motivate me.....

Two days hence, I stepped on the scale to weigh my fatness for the 5 week mark. Alas, still only 5 pounds dropped. I called in the husband reinforcement with the measuring tape. Measuring my waist revealed, since the beginning, 3 1/2 inches lost! My hips showed 3 inches lost! Really happy with those results! Although it has felt slow moving, I am excited to think about the results in the next 5 weeks!

Brief side note: one of the workouts my husband had written out for me was to run 3 miles. I was totally dreading it, but once I got out there, put on my iPod Touch and actually ran it....I wanted him to write another distance run into my workouts! I liked getting away from the screaming kids, listening to MY own music, and enjoying the time by myself. Just sayin.

Perhaps pictures next time!